to write a deep, thoughtful end of the year essay for my Word Blog. I mean, everyone is doing it. Surely I can manage a deep, thoughtful, inspiring end of the year essay about 2016.

Not. Hardly.

I’m not going to post it. The essay, that is. I think you’ll thank me. It ended up being several thousand words. So I’ll just recap in bullets.

I’m painfully me here. Shit will be flung. Proceed at your own risk.

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  • Celebrity deaths. Bad bad. Except
  • Castro. Wish he’d taken the NK pipsqueak and the UN with him  15219474_10207753609733363_7502211746726506043_n
  • Richard Adams – 2016 wasn’t done with us until the very end
  • Someone in this neighborhood has some MIGHTY HUGEASS fireworks. That last one rocked the house. It sounds like a war zone out there.
  • Health Insurance. Ah what fuckery. My health ‘insurance’ will go up to 500.00 a month, plus a 1500.00 deductible AND copays. Please do not pat me on the back and congratulate me on how YAY we all now have health insurance. No we don’t. Really. My government can’t run a whore house and a bar and they went and put the Sheriff of Nottingham in charge of making sure we buy it. People can’t afford this shit. They’re paying the fine because it’s cheaper. There are alternatives!
  • Speaking of, I have to get my blood sugar under control this year. In January, to be precise. Immediately. Tomorrow. It’s not been under 250 since Thanksgiving. I will talk about that in a few.
  • Bill. Actually, once the crying was over, I had to admit it was the best summer of my life. Had he not turned into a wanking ass and had actually DONE what he said he would do (work hard at the relationship with me and COMMUNICATE)  I would have been moving to Florida this Memorial Day weekend. However, he turned into a wanking ass so now I’m hunting for a new-
  • job here. In this area. For real. I had a student hit me this year. Really. Not once but twice and he is STILL in this school. And there are other issues upcoming and I’m just sooooo done.
  • Politics entered my sweet garden. Sorry. I’m going to have this rant and then sit on it again for as long as I can and not bother or upset anyone.
  • Someone who I am fond of and admire told us at Christmas we need to be fearless. Well sometimes being fearless means standing up and being honest. Sadly, there are those who cannot handle honesty or the fact that someone has a different opinion and/or outlook and experience and will probably spend the next 4 years crying in their safe place.
  • I think safe places are stupid.
  • I don’t think we’re in any place to sit around the campfire and sing kum bah yah.
  • Others were fearless and got shouted at for it. Can we just agree to disagree?
  • No, I did NOT vote for him. I didn’t vote for HER either. Why are people voting with their girly bits?
  • And by the way – to all the ‘He’s not my president’ people… uhm… the previous regime wasn’t MY president for 8 years. He still managed to screw me up the ass without the benefit of lube anyway. It’s going to be a rough ride. We might as well work TOGETHER to fix this wankery rather than go to our respective corners and cry. Trust me, there are true Conservatives that are equally unhappy. We both fielded horrible candidates, so let’s try NOT to eat each other. Yeah, our candidate sucked, but so did yours.
  • I pissed people off this year. That’s normal and normally that wouldn’t warrant a mention, but this year, I pissed off someone I considered a friend and we were just having a discussion. Nothing to get irate about. It wasn’t even politics. I wasn’t irate. I would offer cheesecake, but they don’t like cheesecake and I’m kinda at a loss. Oh well.
  • Speaking of pissing people off… you may or may not get it. I won’t explain.titanic-sinking
  • DAMN! Is that another Grey hair???
  • My PC Kindle is pissing the shit out of me. It keeps crashing because I have over 29000 books and 144 folders and they get dumped. Actually, my computer is the culprit BUT, Amazon now has collections so I’m putting them there and then all I have to do is ‘share’ the collection with my PC Kindle. Except every time you add one in at the cloud, it rotates the new folder to the top. They need to be in alphabetic order, dammit.
  • It also makes me re sign in every 30 minutes. I’m downloading away and then it dumps my work and makes me do it again.
  • I was going to go buy a flat screen television this weekend. I was going to set it up here in my cave when I take down all the Christmas decorations and then watch Berlin Station on it from the warmth of my comfy chair and knit while watching. Sadly, I discovered that the speeding ticket I got in April wasn’t paid (I mailed the money order, I think, and they didn’t get it) and now I have to pay it PLUS a penalty. Yep. Total of 262.00. So much for the flat screen television. 😦
  • William Edward is tugging at me big time. Really, Please remember that Guy was NOT a nice person, especially in early Season 1. That’s who I patterned William after. He’s going to woo Vivienne. We remember how he wooed Marian. Just remember that. (I passed a short bunny to a friend and her response was – well, he’s mean. I then called a 2nd buddy and gave them the bigger bunny and she said, well, that’s just Guy)
  • Richard mentioned that he doesn’t think he’ll be doing anymore nude scenes. He thinks he’s too old and his body is too old and no one wants to look at his old peaches anymore.  hmmm mmm…    I beg to differ.     tumblr_inline_ogm5a7dss01r7sxx6_500-nsfw
  • My cats hate me. Lord Thunderbutt NEEDS to go on a diet. They are fed twice a day but he’s a pain in the ass ALL day wanting to be fed NOW. He’s really annoying. So I’m putting their food in their treat mice. It actually is half the amount I would normally give but they each have a mouse and they have to work for that food. Girly Girl isn’t having much of it and Lord Thunderbutt has nasty glared at me all day. He finally went in and knocked his treat mouse everywhere to get the food. They’ll figure it out.
  • I’ve spent 24 hours at All Romance Ebooks. It was my go to for ebooks. Mostly freebies. Sometimes the freebies were good. Sometimes they weren’t. But there was some great stuff there. That’s where I got my Lexi Blakes! Anyway, on the 28th, they announced they were closing at midnight tonight. They operated at a loss this year. After 2 days of TRYING to get to the site, I got there last night and started backing up my archive. A lot of my books were missing. I had some I hadn’t downloaded and they weren’t there. I’m not going to bitch. They were freebies. I archived on my external 1400 books. All of that since 2009. Between them closing and my other place to obtain books reasonably *cough* closing over the summer, I’m kinda at a loss. I guess I’ll be going to the publishers direct. Joy.
  • But then, do I NEED more books? Probably not.
  • But then again…
  • You know, I have a big bulletin pin board. I’ve always wanted one but it’s been naked. But it’s not anymore.  img_20161229_163249-1

So you can see why I didn’t post the complete blow out. This is just the bulleted list. Can you imagine me waxing on and on and on  over each point like a bad case of diarrhea?

On Monday, I had dinner with two old friends. I don’t mean we’re old, we went to college many many years ago together. Over 30 years ago. It’s been that long since we’ve seen each other. All three of us were music majors. She sang – gorgeous voice, he was a sax player and then there was me. It’s funny, I considered myself the least talented of the bunch, but I’m the only one DOING music as a living. She now works for another college in the data department and he owns a tattoo parlor. She’s fighting cancer. His wife is a severe diabetic and has other health issues. We talked about how different our lives are now than what we thought they’d be 30 plus years ago. She’s praying her chemo treatment on Tuesday will be the last one. He’s looking at burial insurance and making wills. He’s very worried about his wife and I’m diabetic and drinking cokes. I was informed that that was stupid. It is.

And only I can fix it.

We’re looking at the fact that our lives are more than half over. It’s all down hill. If I don’t get a handle on my blood sugar, I won’t make it to 20 to 25 years to retire. That’s 10 to 15 years for me. People always say how much BETTER they feel when their sugar is down. I’ve not felt ill, until I went home. I felt bloated and bogged down and tired and just NOT well the entire week. My blood sugar was at stupid level. So now I believe them. My morning and afternoon looks like this.

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I do that twice a day. If I’m sick, you can add 6 more meds to it, double up on the vitamin C and a second inhaler. Twice a day. I didn’t sign up for this. This isn’t how I planned my golden years. I’ve gained the weight that I lost back over the spring and summer. I was going to join a fitness gym, but I have to wait to see how bad my health insurance is going to set me back. I’ll know by the 14th. I don’t want to live the rest of my life this way. Carrie Fisher was only 5 years older than me. Prince was my age. I’m not ready to face God.

My doctor says I can reduce a lot of this IF I can get my blood sugar down. This morning it was 328. Blame the chocolate. I’m wanting chocolate and a coke now, but I’m not going to ask. Spawn will have a complete hairy. If the insurance is too awful, maybe I’ll just walk after school around the lake behind the school in the evening. If it’s not dark. Or too cold.

I should get a treadmill. Can’t afford it. Oh well.

Now I’m done.

I wish each one of you a very Happy New Year. Praying it’s better than the one going out.

 

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